My yoga teacher has been talking about juicing for the past few months, so, the day after my bf's wedding (and open bar), I decided that a detox was in order and that juicing might do the trick. I reckoned that replacing a few solid meals with liquid fruit & veg might also help shed some of the winter weight that stands between me and my summer wardrobe.
The first act of my new regime involved a fraught climb up a step-stool to retrieve my erstwhile retired juicer from the very back of a top shelf. The morning's hangover made the task doubly dangerous, but spurred by pity for my long-suffering liver and a love of some too-tight dresses, I managed to succeed without injury.
Meet my juicer.
That's a Jack Lalanne Power Juicer, purchased on Amazon for about £40 five years ago - an 'entry level' juicer bought with a view to seeing how I took to the whole concept. If juicing became a habit, I thought at the time, I'd eventually spring for a more advanced and expensive machine. Until then, I would revel in the kitchness of owning a kitchen appliance named for a 1950's American fitness icon.
Meet Jack Lalanne.
I decided to set Jack to the task of extracting juicy goodness from some celery, cucumber and apple that I had in the fridge.
If mine was a more puerile sense of humour, the picture of my breakfast prep would have looked more like this:
Luckily, my humour is far too sophisticated for that.
I washed the lot and cored the apples and let Jack Lalanne do the rest. (Purists say that you should peel everything, but in my opinion, life's too short, and any life-expectancy gains won by peeling will, in fact, be negated by the amount of time you'd spent peeling.)
My first juice of the day was a vitamin and mineral wonder; nutritious and delicious, to borrow a suitably retro marketing phrase.
For lunch I decided on something more substantial - a melange of carrot and beetroot.
Again, the result tasted great and was surprisingly filling. I could feel the energising and cleansing benefits of juicing already. I couldn't believe that Jack been relegated to the back of a cupboard all this time!
Then it all came back to me.
While I was feeling virtuous and healthy, my kitchen was a scene from CSI Vegas. Instead of leaping over tall buildings or solving improbable math functions, my juice-begotten gains were put to work scouring beetroot stains from surprising surfaces, wondering what Grissom and Willows would have made of the splatter.
Style File Followers Take Note:
1. I love champagne. And red wine. And a mean Manhattan. This detox is gonna kill me.
2. Although I can't be bothered to peel, I do respect the principal that if juicing aids in the body's absorption of the essential nutrients in fruit and veg, it will also encourage our bodies to absorb more of the toxins (ie. pesticides) used in conventional farming. So only buy a organic to juice.
3. To have had such a damned spot, Lady Macbeth must have been juicing.
4. The good thing about the clean up is that it burns calories.
5. Jack Lalanne passed away last year at the age of 96. [Liquid] Food for thought.
6. Owning a George Foreman Grill is not the same thing.